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Newly diagnosed-I just want to stop hurting
3 Replies
jasawi75 - June 24

I am a 34 yo wife and mother of 4 children-3 of which are under the age of 5. I began finding it increasingly difficult to just take care of the day-to-day running of my household, work 2 day's a week and be a normal "loving" wife. I saw my doctor a few months ago and after extensive tests, many of which came back negative we settled on Fibromyalgia. Ok, so I'm accepting the diagnosis, I'm on Savella (for just a week), does the daily exhaustion and chronic "flare-ups" 7-10 days before my cycle EVER go away? I just want to feel normal again. Does diet help? I try to eat healthy, take Rx Prenatal Vitamins even though I'm not pregnant just for that extra boost, but sometimes I feel, what's the point.


Stacey373 - June 25

Hi Jasawi75!

Where do I begin? I don't have much time, I have to go to my dr appt in just a few minutes, but I wanted to let you know that you are not alone with this. I was diagnosed about 1 1/2 years ago...but looking back, I don't think me, my family, or even my Dr. dealt with this disease. I've been spiraling down ever since (physically & emotionally) About 2-3 weeks ago I was having a real hard time dealing with all these health problems and feeling like everyone just thinks I'm lazy and like it's "all in my head". (after seriously talking to my husband, he REALLY did think these things!)

The first thing you have to always remember is to STAY POSITIVE!!! I know that's easier said than done some times...but I swear having a positive attitude will go a long way with this disease.

There is no cure for Fibromyalgia...and you are going to have bad days and good days, bad weeks and good weeks (hell, even bad months and good months!). You need to find the right combination of medications that will work for you and they will at least ease some of your, it won't all go away...but the meds do help.

I can't imagine having to take care of 3 kids under the age of 5! that's one thing I consider myself lucky 3 kids are between the ages of 9-16 and they can pretty much take care of themselves if they have to (like make a sandwich if I can't make dinner for them) My only advice to you for that is maybe only focus on taking care of the kids and let your husband deal with the housework and what-not. Do you have a supportive husband? Does he really understand what's going on with you? that's something else I'm pretty lucky with...I have the best husband in the world! (at least I think so! LOL) But I had to read him some of the more "emotional" stories and posts on here for a few days before he REALLY started understanding what's going on with me.

You mentioned the "flare-ups" with your period...I'm actually talking to my doctor today about that. take a look at the "Associated Conditions" in the boxes on the left side of this page and read about Dysmennorhea. This condition is all about the Horrible symptoms of having severe periods and how it can make the fibro even worse each month during that time. My doctor diagnosed me with it, but I wasn't given any meds. So today I'm going to find out if there is anything I can do about this. Another option is getting on birth control pills to ease the symptoms and maybe the flare ups that go along with it.

Okay...I have to get off of here and get to my appt. I just wanted to let you know that you are NOT alone and you can vent to me (and I'm sure everyone else on here) any time!
Hope you have a good day, Take Care of Yourself, Stacey :o)


jasawi75 - June 26

Hi Stacey,
Thank you soooo much for your words, your encouraging words. I am especially going to follow your example and read some of the posts on here to my husband. He is really sweet and trying to be understanding as best he can. When I describe how I feel he just says, "That must suck!" He does try to be helpful but I'm such a martyr. Over the eyears I had developed the mentality that if I want the housework, laundry, etc. done right that I needed to do it myself. I am beginning to realize that that mentality does not live in agreement with Fibromyalgia. Your suggestion about letting him do the housework and I just deal with the kids sounds AWESOME. I am going to try and implement that this weekend.
Thanks so much for replying to my vent.


Stacey373 - June 27

Hello Jasawi75!

Oh My Gosh! I am SO that way too! I have a really hard time letting my husband and kids do alot of the housework! I always say "If you are going to do it, then do it the RIGHT way!" (of course, the "right" way is MY way! LOL) For the past couple of weeks my husband has been doing the laundry and I'm constantly having to bite my tongue and not tell him he's doing it "wrong". I keep reminding myself that he is just trying to help me out so I don't have to worry about it and that I need to be appreciative instead of a controlling freak! LOL So instead of saying anything to him, I quietly go behind him and "fix" everything he did "wrong" (like re-fold the clothes or put them on hangers)

You said that you take all kinds of vitamins...have you been tested for a Vitamin D deficiency? Most Fibro people have a Vitamin D deficiency and my doctor has me taking 50,000IU once a week. I don't know if you can get this "amount" over the counter, I have a prescription for it.

I mentioned before that I was going to talk to my doctor about the dysmennorhea and the horrible symptoms I have each month. We decided instead of giving me another prescription that I really can't afford right now, she had me buy this stuff called Progesterone Cream 1000 mg. It's an OTC that I got at the local pharmacy for $7.00 and you just rub this cream on the "soft" skin (back of knees, inside of elbows, tummy, etc) and it's supposed to help with the severe cramps and what-not. She told me to use it 12 days each month through my cycle. I'm going to start using it today and we'll see if it really helps.

But I thought this might be something you could try too! It's worth a shot, right?!?

Also, If you are going to read some of these posts to your husband...look for one that is titled something like "letter to normals". there is also another post that a lady wrote in the "Family Members" section about her husband not helping her or even believing her. it's really sad...but alot of the more emotional posts really got through to my husband and he's now understanding how physically AND emotionally debilitating this all really is. I also wrote one in the "support Groups" section titled "I'm new and want to introduce myself"...I don't know if that one will help, but you can read it to him if you want.

Take care, Stacey :o)



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