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Just exited the hospital
15 Replies
Noca - October 12

Just came home from the hospital after staying 2 days in an ER/psych ward following an intentional OD. I still struggle with depression a lot and fibro pain doesn't help my situation... Just telling you guys I'm alive and okay.. Hope you're feeling better than I am, have a less painful day (((hugz)))


axxie - October 12

Hey Noca, glad you are on the mend. You take it easy a few days, hopefully you being on the site and answering questions will help you with your depression. I do know how you feel, I give you my hugs.


sleepingin91 - October 12

Hey Noca, I hope you are okay and that the pain eases for you. I'd give you a big hug if I could :)


kvc33 - October 12

Hi Noca, so sorry to hear that. I've been there myself and actually it's quite a funny story. After going to the hospital and having a nurse tell me I shouldn't be there (not sick enough), the doctor sent me to what was supposed to be a state of the art mental health facility. Trouble is when they opened it up they didn't realize that many people living on the street with mental illness are also addicted to drugs and they didn't know what to do with them. There was no doctor available until the morning and we were sent there at about 1 am. All night long we listened to a guy snore in one room while a guy in the waiting room who was "living" there paced and sang and sighed. Nobody did anything for this guy and he drove me nuts. Finally my boyfriend talked to him and he calmed right down. We left before breakfast, couldn't sit any longer and they wouldn't let me lie down anywhere. It was quite a night. Before we got there, while in the hospital we listened to a nurse who couldn't speak English very well try to communicate with a half deaf dementia patient. She kept saying, "Do you know where are you?" And the lady would say, "What?" "DO YOU KNOW WHERE ARE YOU?" In the meantime they couldn't get any blood out of my veins because they had collapsed with fright so I just cried while they poked me. If they hadn't given me a tranquilizer I was going to punch out the nurse who had been a bitch to me. I had to keep holding myself back. I told the needle guy that I was sorry and that I suffered from anxiety and he said no problem as he did too. All in all a night to remember. My bf did find the chairs quite comfortable though which is surprising as he also has fibro. I use light therapy for my depression and it helps a lot. Have you tried it?


fibromite.u.k. - October 12

Ahhh Noca, we are all hear for you and thinking about you. Please don't try this again, I know life is hard when you have fibromyalgia and even more hard when you have depression. I know because I have had depression in the past and it is the worst thing ever. It will pass, I promise you. Think of all the people who would miss you if you were not around. Our life is not for us to take, I know just how hard this is to understand when you are so low, but God has our lives in his hand and there is a reason behind all that happens to us. I will pray for you. We are all hear to talk to you at any time. God Bless.


Stacey373 - October 12

Hi Noca - I kind of know what you are going through right now. I've been getting very depressed because of this illness over the last several weeks. I don't know if this is what everyone calls a "flare" or not...but I've never been in this much pain or had these problems as bad as I have been lately. This has been going on for several weeks now (feels likes months) and it's been one thing after the next that's been keeping me down. As soon as I start to feel better with one problem, I get something else wrong and I'm back down again.

I think being down for so long is really causing my depression. My family has gotten to the point that they are complacent about it. It's just Mom being sick AGAIN. Mom's got another headache...Mom's in bed AGAIN. I'm SO damn tired of feeling like this. I want to get up and get stuff done and feel half way "normal" and instead I'm constantly in bed and constantly in pain. It's gotten to the point that I feel like this is never going to end. I usually always try to stay positive....try to remember that things will get better...but right now I guess I can't see that light at the end of the tunnel.

anyways...I've been dealing with severe bouts of depression since I was a teenager, but I've never once thought of doing anything drastic. You are so young and have so much to look forward to. You have to keep remembering that no matter how bad it feels at the moment, it WILL get better. Even when you can't see that "light at the end of the tunnel"....I promise it's ALWAYS there.

I'm sending big hugs to you...Take Care, Stacey :o)



Glad to hear you are alright.
What meds did you take?

Hang in there. I have felt HOPELESS plenty of times... And still do most of the time.

Take care of yourself, you have plenty of people in your corner.



Fantod - October 12

Noca - I am so sorry that you are feeling so low. You know, we are all here to listen when you are feeling bad. Don't forget that you have the option to talking to us instead of ending up in the hospital. We do understand your pain unlike people that don't have to live with it every day. I know you have a lot of challenges, but you are a bright person. And, I've seen you come a long way since you first joined us on the board. I think about you often and I hope that you will continue to improve your outlook in the days ahead. Hugs to you and don't forget you can share your feelings on here any time. We are, afterall, friends. XO


jrzgirl1 - October 12

Noca, I know how you feel, I have thought about that many of times, I would be driving and in pain, thinking that my family would be better without me.
I would look at the huge tree;s and telephone poles and say gee which one would kill me it I hit it, The medical bills are so high and thinking about my future with untolerable pain, then God steps in and tells me he loves me. I was saved by his Grace,not by my works, I have been born again for 11 yrs now and I could not slap God in the face, yes I have a larger than life accidental life ins. policy, 1 million $$$ but it is not my time yet I AM SO GLAD YOU ARE ALIVE, WE ALL NEED EACH OTHER


Auvonto - October 12

Norca, glad to hear you are still with us. its hard i know but hang in there. [[hugs]]


Noca - October 12

Thank you everyone for being so caring! [3 You don't know how much it means to me to have people who understand what I'm going through.

kvc33 - I have never tried light therapy before, wouldn't know where to start.


Fantod - October 12

It may be just historical happenstance that light therapy was first identified as a treatment for SAD, because many new applications are on the horizon. This may have wide ramifications for reducing the reliance on drugs in the future. But it takes an arduous clinical research effort to prove the effectiveness of new applications - consider that it took 15 years for the definitive trials of bright light therapy to come to completion.

Non-Seasonal Major Depression

Studies of light therapy for depression have not been limited to SAD. There is promising evidence that it may be effective in nonseasonal depression as well. A recent joint trial at Columbia University Medical Center and Wesleyan University indicates that patients with chronic depression - who have experienced virtually no relief in years - respond as well to light therapy as do patients with SAD. Dr. Daniel Kripke of the University of California at San Diego compared a set of placebo-controlled trials of bright light with antidepressant drug trials, and found the improvement rates to be similar. One major difference is that light appears to work within one week, while medications may take up to eight weeks to match the efficacy of light. Interestingly, light used in conjunction with medication appears to be superior to either one alone. Several European hospitals have already begun to administer light therapy alongside drug treatment.


kvc33 - October 12

Noca, I use a light therapy device called the litebook. There are a number of devices on the market and there are special bulbs that can be used as well. They affect a person's sleep/wake cycle as well. Most of us have delayed sleep phase syndrome which means that we tend to be awake after midnight and sleep in. If you have that problem and you want to correct it, you wake yourself up at the time you would like to wake up and sit in front of the light for 20- 30 minutes. You may feel slight nausea for the first week. Check out medical supply stores or on-line to purchase a device. Bulbs are cheap but must be the right kind, the litebook is about two hundred dollars. I have seasonal affective disorder as well as depression and before using the light I was much sicker. Results are fast, usually within days. Google around and read up about it.


Noca - October 13

kvc33 - I have that "delayed sleep phase syndrome which means that we tend to be awake after midnight and sleep in." I'm always feeling wide awake right around midnight before I try to sleep and I am a terrible morning person.

I will ask my doctor about this light therapy box. Do you have to stare directly at it or can you be doing something else like sitting on the computer while it points towards your eyes?


kvc33 - October 16

The unit is put to the side and you do not look directly at it. It is suggested that you read while the light is on. Recent research has shown that most of the eyeball's light receptors are on the top so it would be best to have the light above the eyes rather than at desk level.


Noca - October 17

I see my doctor on Monday. Is there any good place to buy light boxes that you would recommend?



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