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How do i we get family and friends to realise tha were not just being lazy ??
3 Replies
rachel - September 18

ive had fms for 3 1/2 years now and still not better ... my family are great but friends and friends of friends seem to thing that your just a lazy person always in bed or not doing the chores ... how do we explain that we just can't do it as if we do over do it we pay for it double the next day ?? i try so hard to put up a front but lately ive found myself in a worse state than i was a year ago, trying to act as a naormal person in public when i can hardly walk with the pain .... runnng eyes and nose and a clicking jaw seems to be a new problem with me ... i didnt think it was a progressive health problem?? ... at 34 am i young to get fms ?? thanks for reading ... rachel ( take care all and keep smiling)


tonyab1838 - September 17

If they are your true friends, they will understand. I guess I am lucky, in a strange way, my left hand and arm swell when I have over done it. That way there is physical proof that something is going on. FMS has also been a progressive problem also, it started in my left arm and has worked through the rest of my body. Over a period of year and 8 months. Your not to young, unfortunately, for FMS. It mainly hits women between 25 and 50 years old. I am 35 now but it started when I was 33. Believe in yourself and if other people don't, then they aren't worth worrying about. You are in pain and the added stress isn't going to make you feel any better. Take care of yourself and remember on here we do care. I hope that this helps a little. Take care and God bless!


rachel - September 17

thanks for that ... my friends and family dont understand i can't do the normal things they do..i try hard to keep up with them but seem to suffer more fo going to start a new programme in the rhumatic hospital i have to go to.. 10 am till 3pm one day a week to try and be taught how to cope with the fms.. seems a good idea but a bit daunting what im going to be asked to do...on the upside i have a fantastic husbund that helps so much to look after the kids ( 4) and keep a tidy ( ish ) house... i would be lost with out him ....i do worry that i seem not to do anything in the house some days but i try to cook and clean the most needest parts of the house every day seems poeple only see me when im resting out after i have done the bitts i try to do... oh weel its going to be like it a few more years yet so deal with it i say and keep smileing ..... i hope you do take the rest and relaxsation you need and also still have the laughs you deserve ... take care tonyab and keep smileing ....rachel


Jan - September 18

You hit it right on the head with saying ppl think you are lazy, rachel. One of my friends knows what I am going thru as a friend of hers has had FM for some years. But my family is clueless. I have tried explaining to them and I can see they either just switch off (blank look), or they just don't get it. I tried explaining to my oldest, now 18, a few months back what I had and what he could/should expect on occasions. Yet yesterday, when I came back from a walk and utterly exhausted, he asked me what was wrong, I explained again, and he said "Oh, I thought you had that a few months back". Sadly a lot of ppl seem to think we use FM as an excuse, and its just a 'thing' that happens once, then all gone. God I wish it would go away, but it never does !!



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