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People who think FMS is in Our Heads
6 Replies
dwilmoth - May 23

My husband's best friend is a Physical Therapist. He's a non-believer in FMS. You know, It's all in my head. I am trying to educate my hubby on this and he is telling him all I need is PT, exercise, and nutritution. That it's not really a good diagnosis that most of us diagnosed are not really suffering from FMS. We just need to toughen up. How do I combat this? Like when I suggest that I forgot something b/c of Fibrofog, or when my fingers are blue b/c of rheynaulds, or my nose runs all of the time b/c of rhinitis, or when I am cold all of the time, or the diiziness has me banging into walls and hubby suggests we all do that, quit blaming everything on fibro. You just need to forget that diagnosis and not use it as a crutch. When I am thinking Thank God I have this diagnosis b/c I thought I was losing my mind b/4 I got this diagnosis. ?

 

melmel23 - May 26

wow it's refreashing to hear someone else say thank god for your diagnoses! That's exactly how i felt a few weeks back when i was diagnosed, the disbelief and lack of understanding from others at times has made me feel suicidal and so alone especaily before my diagnoses. not only do we need to deal with the condition but there's the; loss of socail life, money for some, friends and respect and so on. You know i really think that there should be a campaign or television programme to increase awareness. Perhaps we could all work togther and create a national or sorry international annual Fibromyalgia awareness day. Anyway i know you are not crazy and you cant just snap out of it, so dont worry about those who dont understand, if you can. I learnt a while back that when someone gives an opinion and uses terminology that makes it sound like a fact to question them and say oh you know this for a fact? What are hour exact sources?( i.e who exactly told you that or where did you learn that what official report di you read? ) Come back to me when you have something to back up what your saying meantime please start your sentance in my opinion! that should hopefully discredit them. Tell the universe every day a mantra that your husbamd understands, takes you seriuusly regardless of others. Im positive it will manifest! Take it easy :-)

 

mssue7d - July 19

I thank God too. I was just diagnosed this week,but I have been suffering for the last 4 or 5 years-I think I have been checked for everything under the sun - everything seems to come back OK how frustrating is that! It made me feel like a hypocondriac. I have been through breast cancer along with chemo so alot of my problems -I thought -were due to the chemo-but that was 4 years ago. It actually kinda upsets me to think of all of the suffering all these years when I read all the symptoms related to this I have suffered most all of them. One would think they could've diagnosed this earlier. Forgive me for rambling, I am new here but I wouldn't want to be in your shoes cause I would probably get really stressed with hubby and friend playing against me. Sometimes people think they are helping when they are making things more difficult. I don't know about U but stress that I used to thrive off of now knocks me in for a loop, I end up completely washed out for days. I hope things have gotten better since U posted I'll be praying for U!

 

LindaQ - December 11

Sometimes I have learned to just quit talking to them about it, they DON'T GET IT and to not waist my energy on trying to make them! Men especially have a hard time understanding, they are problem solvers, so if they can't solve it, ignore it or deny it and it will go away! My hubby is better at it than most as he is a mental health counselor and in the medical fields but sometimes he slips up too. Or has to see me at my worst days to be reminded.
I just quit explaining to others, let them do some reading and getting educated on it and then they might understand some. It is hard when we look healthy, aren't waisting away like with cancer ( thank God!) , so it is hard to understand for others who do not have it.
Give yourself a break and just tell them, "well you don't understand" and walk away.
We are here for you!
Linda

 

tnichel - December 13

I'm sorry your be questioned at every turn. It is hard dealing with people who think they know more than the doctors. Especially those who work in the medical profession but are not doctors themselves. Most of the people I told after I got my diagnosis never call me anymore. I think they don't know what to think and feel uncomfortable around me now. But I also have just as many friends who said "That makes since. You used to sleep constantly in college and were always in pain." You really need you husbands support right now and not comments from his friend. It's probably his way of trying to fix the problem and show you that he cares but it's not helping you. Try telling him you just need his support right now or have him go to a doctors appt. with you. Best of wishes. I was diagnosed 3 months ago and was so happy to know what was happening. I haven't fully dealt with it though b/c some when the pain is low I feel normal. You'll go thru a plethora of emotions before things even out. Don't be too hard on yourself and keep the negativity away from you until you can better deal with it. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!

 

agrim - December 29

sounds like my husband until he went along w/me to my appt w/specialist. better understanding now. very helpful and when i can't function so well and have to lie down and crash....it's ok. now knows that my tears r not for nothing. still hard at times but getting there, hopefully your husband will also...his friend...maybe not. i walk when i can. good nutrition and i "crash" when i have to. sometimes i just don't like being "tough" all the time and smile my way through this....now he knows. i know it's hard for you...he's gonna have to come around for you. and you hang in there for yourself. FMS is NOT in our heads. it's all over our body.
here for you...and take care.

 

phaze33 - April 30

I'm glad someone mention college! I use to sleep all day...not from partying but come to think of it I always complained of pains ( including back pains) when I was a child. My mom took me to the doctor and was prescribed muscle relaxer. She told me it was probably "growing pains". I use to sleep all the time. I have not been diagnosed with fibro but I recently did a search for my main problems (chronic fatigue, chronic headaches, body aches, muscle twitching, and dizziness. They all pointed to fibro. I now have a name for it but want to make sure that it is fibro and not lupus. Once I know the answer...my husband can be more understanding and don't think that it is because I am lazy, love to sleep, and need to exercise. What are your thoughts?

 

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