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New to board.Give me courage to face Fibro. I need ur help.
8 Replies
RoseLove - May 28

I am new to board. I am from India.I am very poor in english and this is my first letter in english so please bear with my mistakes.5 years back fibro attaked my life and taken away everything I loved.I lost my job. My boyfriend married to another girl.
I have done Computer Diploma course & postgraduate in Arts. But at present doing nothing.I have pain in joints & muscles. I completely lost interest in life. I am failing to do my regular activities. Trying to control my emotions. I am living with my parents.I have one younger sister. My family supports me lot. But I dont want to trouble them more. Pain is unbearable but I dont want to share this situation with them. I dont want to disturb their mental peace, already they have suffered lot because of me.
Marriage is compulsory in our society .This is big problem for me and my parents.Few years back I also wanted to marry, dreamed about husbond & kids.But now I dont want to marry, because I cant handle it.I cant do anything more than 10 minutes because of my weak muscles & joints.People suggest me that get married and ur problems will be solved. But I know fibro is uncurable.They dont understand my health condition. People's pressur for marriage, making me frustrated.
I am feeling alone. Friends I need ur support & love. Hope u will understand me.... :)Trying to smile, feeling light.


FibroInParadise - May 28

I am recently diagnosed and still going through all the emotions that comes along with.

I need a lot of help myself. But I will tell you - YOU ARE NOT ALONE. No matter where you are in the world.

Your English is great by the way - what is your first language? Maybe we can teach each other?

We can talk by email if you want. It may be the blind leading the blind but I will help if I can :)

Stay strong. Breathe. We are all in this together


Fantod - May 28

RoseLove - Welcome to the board! You did very well explaining your situation and how you feel.

Do you see a doctor? Do you take medication for Fibromyalgia (FMS)? If so, what do you take?
Have you tried Ayurveda medicine which is part of your culture?

Your problems will not be solved by marriage and if no one else does, at least you have enough sense to know that. Fibromyalgia can not be cured but it can be managed with certain classes of prescribed medication or holistic (natural) remedies. It is recognised by the World Health Organization, The Centers for Disease Control (USA) and the National Arthitis Foundation. You are not alone, a hypochondriac or lazy.

I used Google and found several options for the treatment of FMS in India. Daradia: The Pain Clinic in Kalkata or they have an office at Charnok Hospital, West Bengal and Axon Pain Center, Hyderabad. There may be more, I just looked briefly. Also, you can contact your local hospital and see if they have a pain management specialist or a rheumotologist with an interest in Fibromyalgia.

FMS interrupts the deep sleep cycle with short bursts of high intensity brain activity. Your muscles require deep sleep in order to repair themselves from the days activities. No deep sleep means higher levels of pain. This rapidly becomes a vicious circle.

There are some natural remedies that you can try to help with sleep and pain. Melatonin is very good for sleep. If you have cramps and muscles that twitch, Malic Acid (pill) is good for that. I like Curamin (spice) for pain. And, I believe that you are not only lonely but very depressed. Depression also makes pain worse. You could try St John's Wort for that. I'm sure your boyfriend marrying someone else was very upsetting to you. The longer a chronic pain cycle continues, the harder it becomes to manage or stop. If you are not being treated medically, that is a problem and needs to be fixed.

In India (I looked online) the following prescribed medication is available for the treatment of FMS: Lyrica, Amitriptyline and Milnacipran under the brand names of Milborn and Milnace. These are just a few of the options available.

The book that I like that explains FMS very well and simply is "Fibromyalgia for Dummies." It can be purchased online through the Amazon website.
If you are better educated about your health problem, than you will feel some sense of control. Knowledge with action is power. And, you will be able to correct and educate the family members who do not understand this complicated syndrome.

It is possible to have a fairly normal life including marriage and children if that is what you want. Living with Fibromylgia is hard but if you get proper treatment and understand how to manage your life things can be OK. If your parents support you than you will have to ask them for help to manage this health problem. Even in the USA with all of our fancy hospitals and well trained doctors, we still have problems getting proper care. Every Fibromyalgia patient must be proactive about this.

You are not alone with feeling helpless and frustrated. I try to be grateful for anything that I can accomplish instead of focusing on the losses. It helps me get through the day.

If you are having trouble understanding my advice, you can probably find a free translator online so you can read this in your native language.

Keep in touch with us and let us know how you are doing. Take care.


kvc33 - May 28

My dear friend, Thank you for writing to us and telling us about your situation. You are suffering from depression as well as fibromyalgia. You must stay engaged in life and do things that make you happy in order to get better even if you don't feel like doing them. Congratulations on getting your diplomas. Your English is very good as well. You are right, marriage won't make you better and unless you had a very understanding husband, the stress of it would make you worse. Even in our culture (Canadian) men often leave their wives if they are sick. You might find that a man who also has a health condition would be perfect for you because he would understand and not pressure you. I wish you love and peace.


Fantod - May 28

kvc33 makes a very good point about men and illness. I am divorced after 21 years of marriage. My chronic illness was a factor. Perhaps finding someone in a similar situation who would be more understanding is a viable solution. But first, you must get some medical help and be in a better place both physically and emotionally. Take care.


lucky13 - May 29

You have come to the right place for support, understanding and advice on ways to help yourself.
It gets hard sometimes to physically get out of bed, and some days it's hard mentally to.

You need to do as much research as you can on how to help yourself. Yoga and Thai Chi can help, you need exercise and to learn relaxation techniques, this will also help you sleep better which will help you to feel better. Meditation and positive thinking can help clear your mind and remember what you do have to be thankful for, like the help and love of your family.

There are also herbal remedies that have properties that can help with depression, sleep, energy, pain and memory.

I wish you the best of luck.


RoseLove - May 31

Thanks FibroInParadise,Fantod,kvc33 & lucky13 for love & support.

"FibroInParadise" nice tag dear, it shows ur creative mind. My mother tounge is Hindi,Indian language. Definitily I will try to be in contact with you.
Fantod, at present I am taking Ayurveda medicine along with aollopathy. Also practising yogasanas & Pranayams. Recently I read a book about acupressure,it helps to relax muscles, try it.

Thanks again.

"Life is only traveled once; today's moment becomes tomorrow's memory. Njoy every moment, gud or bad, coz the GIFT of LIFE is LIFE itself."

Have a nice day.....


Sonja44 - June 1

Your english is just fine!

I agree with others...getting married isn't the fix-all. I understand the pressure from others...but it's not their's yours.

I feel very fortunate to have a supportive partner. He has been dealing with Prostate cancer and having fatigue from his treatments. He said to me, "is this what your fatigue feels like? I have a new found respect for what you go through."

He was supportive before his radiation treatments...but no one really understands the depth of pain, fatigue, etc. until they've felt it. Although, I wouldn't wish this on anyone.

I'm glad you found this support site! lots of wonderful folks who know exactly what you are going through.


January - June 2

RoseLove, I hope you are feeling okay tonight - and that you will stay in touch with us. I am from Asia, and I understand the pressure to marry - and if you decide you want to marry, remember that there are some nice men out there who like to take care of others. You can find a good person who loves you for the person you are. There is much you can contribute to a family through love and kindness, I'm sure you know that.

Please don't think fibro is incurable. Think we are working to find a cure someday! There are many ways we can make it better. As you mentioned yourself, acupressure is helping you. I'm sure Ayurveda has good treatments also, if you can find the right ones. The important thing is to keep trying new things, to find what helps you the most.

Are you now living in India - and can you get to any of the treatment centers that Fantod suggested? Perhaps they could help you there. Wishing you luck on this journey.




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