Lonely for friends and family!!!!
kctogetherforever - Apr 17th, 2009 2:41 PM
[ Original Post ]

I am new here. Kathy in Tennessee. I am 63, married 30 yrs to a wonderful supportive man. I have had RA and fibro since I was in my mid 40's. Over the years fibro has driven away friends and family because they just don't get it. I can't come out and play, so they just go play without me. Now they don't even ask me to play anymore. You can't fix this, but I was wondering if I am the only one with this problem? Thanks for listening. Kathy in Tennessee.

Comment


 

JFogged - Apr 17th, 2009 4:28 PM

Kathy,
I think you will find almost everyone on the board has a story about family or friends that do not understand the problems we face on a daily basis.

Do not worry about these friends and family members. you may have to learn to live without them, but it is their loss.

Be strong,
John


BellaMeMe - Apr 17th, 2009 5:31 PM

Hey Kathy~

It's MeMe, a/k/a now BellaMeMe...LOL.. Glad I found here sweet friend!! Hope to see you hear tonight maybe!

Hugs,
BellaMeMe


jacksgramma - Apr 17th, 2009 6:11 PM

Dearest Kathy,

What you wrote is so sad but perfect. It doesn't seem to matter all that you do, or did, it only matters what you can't do anymore. How sad. I've got 3 grand children, one who is 3 and he already knows gramma cannot carry him. My other 2 are only 21 mos. and 12 mos. They just can't understand and I pretty much wreak havoc on myself when I am with them. I watch my 12 month old grandson Luke once a week. He is only 19 pounds so it isn't as difficult but I can sleep an entire day after I'm with him.

My 21 month old Emmy wants me even over mommy so I carry her, or she is glued to my hip the entire time I'm with her.

But where I notice it the most is with my church friends. It seems that they don't even notice I'm not around anymore, or if I am they pretty much ignore that I have Fm. I certainly hate being the center of attention, but to have them be thoughtful would be nice.

One other thing, I've noticed, I am 52, and my friends all have their own lives, their own grand children. So we all seem to be off in our own families. Could that be your friends too?

Blessings and hugs,

Lori


kctogetherforever - Apr 17th, 2009 8:49 PM

BellaMeMe...You found me. I tried to get on the site provided for us again and still can't get on, so I hope you come here and find this. Love you. What a rough day you have had. That mess with PLM was awful and totally unexpected since Julie and I were already members. That has plucked my nerves. LOL...Kisses..



lalab - Apr 18th, 2009 12:39 AM

Hi Kathy it is Laura just comes across as lalab my new screen name. I haven't lost family but friends that is another story. People get acute pain in goes away but chronic pain is just not understood. I do have some friends with fibbro two of them are too bad to do anything. The other one is fun to be with because if we get tired we just stop. Laura


BellaMeMe - Apr 18th, 2009 1:12 AM

I did find you but so sorry we keep missing & crossing one another... I assume your sleeping away now. It's past midnight my time.

Maybe tomorrow sometime we can catch up. We are having a crawfish boil tomorrow. We are suppose to have some rain, too. Not good for a crawfish boil or my FM body! :(

I hope you rest well & have a great weekend.

Hugs,
BellaMeMe


belle1329 - Apr 18th, 2009 1:17 PM

Hey bellameme, saw your namne and just had to comment, my email name is sometimes bellefifi, my grandson calls me fifi :-)


Fantod - Apr 20th, 2009 8:05 AM

The scenario you described sounds oh so familiar. I have fibromyalgia and a host of other health problems. It is anyone's guess which of them will be at the head of the line when I wake up in the morning. It has taken a long time for my family to accept the changes in me. We still butt heads periodically but things are better than they were in the beginning. I try not to dwell on the losses that this syndrome causes in my life. It is healthier to be grateful for anything that you can do no matter how simple. I hope that my comments are helpful to you in some way. Take care and keep in touch.


kittig - Apr 22nd, 2009 7:41 PM

Hi Kathy, my name is kittig, i am also new to this web site. I just found out i had FM lest than a year ago and i am still getting new systoms. I totally understand how you feel however mine is not so much with friends but my husband of 20 years. i think my three children 5,8, and 11 understand it better an has more compassion than he does. I would like you to know you are not out there by yourself and what you are feeling. I am still grieving over having it and trying to take care of my children. You need to know that it may not seem like it but you question was an encouragement to me. I no longer feel like i am out here alone. thank you so much for sharing your heart.

Kindest,
Kitti